Seeking God Day 7
Last night before I fell asleep, I laid in the dark with my eyes closed and listened to the recording my husband had sent me of my kid’s band concert. I listened with tears streaming down my face because I missed them and I wasn’t able to be at the concert. I’m 250 miles north of my hometown on a trip of a lifetime. A time that has been gifted to me to explore and test the gifts God has given me. It’s a good thing and yet, I have to sacrifice other really good things because I’m away. It’s difficult to trust God with the things in my life that are so precious and give up the perceived control I think I have. I want to be in all places at all times, spinning every plate without dropping even one, to be all things to everybody, not disappointing even one person in my life.
Spinning plates is something that I excel at – until I don’t. It’s an all or nothing activity. There is no 99% in plate spinning. That last 1% will kill you. If one plate falls, something breaks.
I suppose it’s a matter of trust when your life is full of plate spinning, or rather it’s a matter of a lack of trust. Do I trust God with my plates to stop trying to spin them? Do I trust God with the people and places and things dear to my heart enough to give them over to Him?
The Lord is my shepherd, I lack nothing.
He makes me lie down in green pastures,
he leads me beside quiet waters, he refreshes my soul.
He guides me along the right paths for his name’s sake.
Even though I walk through the darkest valley,
I will fear no evil, for you are with me;
your rod and your staff, they comfort me.
I long for a spirit that is filled with green pastures and quiet waters and a refreshed soul; fully realizing that even though I may be in the darkest valley I’m not alone and there is nothing to fear.
You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies.
You anoint my head with oil; my cup overflows.
Surely your goodness and love will follow me all the days of my life,
and I will dwell in the house of the Lord forever.
I’m not entirely sure how all of my experiences this week fit together yet. I think it has something to do with listening for the shepherd’s voice and following Him. I wonder if in order to dine at the table of the Lord “in the presence of my enemies” I’m required to trust God even when the “plates” are demanding my attention?
I need a change in posture.
The verse says, “You anoint my head with oil; my cup overflows.”
That is a posture of humility. Kneeling with my head up and my hands outstretched waiting with expectation for a blessing.
Seeking God allows all of us to lay down our “plates.” It allows us to see green pastures and to enjoy quiet waters without guilt. To dine at the table w/o fear of the enemies all around us and to accept an overflowing cup of blessing when it’s given to us. The Shepherd knows where He is going, listen for His voice.\
Here is something to listen to today. Breathe-Jonny Diaz
*Gary and Beatrice who I wrote about a few days ago are safe. Thank you for your prayers.